Support or Not?

Tomorrow is causing me no end of stress, anxiety and agitation and it's really getting me down just thinking about it. With all of the bad publicity that ATOS has had over the past 5 years or more I'm dreading attending the assessment. My GP doesn't think I'm in the right mental state to be working at present and neither does my therapist nor my counsellor and with the amount of time I have to spend in different sessions trying to get control over my mental health I don't have time to work at the same time and doubt any employer would permit me time out every few days to attend these sessions. I look forward to the day I can be back amongst others who are employed but at present my mental illnesses don't make that a viable prospect. 

I'm so tense and agitated I haven't been able to sleep much at all. I just want supporting until I recover and am able to have some sort of normality back in my life which has been the goal for at least 5 years but is still such a long way off. I have made significant ground since I first started suffering but there is still a long way until the end unless an alternative ending occurs in the mean time and I often get so stressed and depressed that I think of creating my own ending (and have attempted a few times in the past few months alone - which I'm not proud of). I just hope that I am assessed properly so I can continue to make my way towards overcoming or at least managing my mental health.




16/04/2013

Depression Questionnaire (PHQ9):
Your Depression Score is 27/27

Anxiety Questionnaire (GAD7):
Your Anxiety Score is 21/21

71 Days and Counting... That's A Long Week!

Still waiting for a new appointment from Ingeus to replace the one I had to cancel in January due to atrocious weather conditions. 

"I'll send a new appointment out in the next week" was what I was told on 7th January 2013, it's now 19th March 2013. A week seems to last longer than 7 days when you are a company employed by the DWP it would seem (71 days so far). If this isn't further proof that I'm being messed about by them I don't know what is.

The whole thing is just making my mental state worse because I don't know what is going on with anything. I seem to spend my life waiting on people. I never know what is going on any more yet they want me to get better and back into work. How exactly is making my health worse going to achieve that?



19/03/2013

Depression Questionnaire (PHQ9):
Your Depression Score is 27/27

Anxiety Questionnaire (GAD7):
Your Anxiety Score is 21/21